Adolescence, Masculinity, and the Workplace: Why Leaders Must Redefine the Conversation

Last month, I watched the limited series "Adolescence" on Netflix. Since its premiere, it has sparked widespread discussion around teenagers, the influence of social media, and evolving ideas of masculinity.

The series also introduced me to words such as manosphere, incel, and concepts like the 80/20 rule. I have seen the series twice and needless to say, the series has left me deeply uncomfortable. If you haven’t watched it yet, I would strongly urge you to do so, whether you are a parent or not.

In this edition of #todayinposh, I want to focus on two aspects that struck me the most and connect them to what I see in workplaces.

A word of caution though - there are major spoilers ahead.

Looking for justification instead of accountability

Right from the first episode, we know who killed the girl. The first time I watched it, I found myself, almost instinctively, looking for a justification for Jamie’s actions. Was he abused? Bullied? Neglected? I was searching for some explanation to make sense of what he did. I realised, uncomfortably, that I am guilty of the same patterns I often critique.

Why this stood out is because I see this very same response playing out in workplaces. When a woman reports inappropriate behaviour, there’s an immediate reflex to defend the man:

• “Are you sure he did that?”
• “He’s not like that.”
• “Do you really want to file a complaint? It could ruin his career.”
• “It must have been a joke — you probably misunderstood.”
• “But weren’t you too friendly with him?”

It is rarely enough to acknowledge that harm was caused. We are conditioned to search for a justification, to protect the accused, often at the cost of the person impacted. Jamie, too, blames bullying and rejection from the girl for his actions. His rationale reflects a troubling socialisation that fails to teach young boys about consent, boundaries, and accountability.

The series starkly captures what I’ve long observed: privilege is rewarded and accountability remains optional.

The Silence Around the Victim’s Story

The other unsettling aspect is the complete absence of the girl’s voice. We get to know her name. We get to know that her nude photos were shared. We also know that she bullied Jamie. Beyond that, she remains invisible: a blip in the storyline.

There is no conversation about the aftermath of the revenge porn that she endured, or the impact of her death on her family and community. And this invisibility feels eerily familiar.

In workplace conversations around sexual harassment, too, I often hear:

• “But what about the man’s reputation?”
• “What if his career is ruined?”
• “What about false complaints?”

Rarely do we ask:

• “How is the woman coping?”
• “What was the cost for speaking up?”

This absence of focus on the victim’s experience reflects a culture that prioritises protecting power over empathy and justice.

Why This Matters for Leaders

I am not, in any way, minimising the influence of social media or the complex challenges teenage boys face today. Adolescence is a brilliant piece and a necessary wake-up call for parents, schools, and society to have open, uncomfortable conversations with boys and girls alike.

But it also made me realise how urgently we need similar conversations in our workplaces.

Because boys like Jamie grow up. They enter our offices, take on roles of influence, and shape organisational behaviour, often carrying forward the same unexamined beliefs about power, gender, and what is considered ‘normal’ or ‘harmless’.

At work, this takes the form of casual sexism, power struggles, and in extreme cases, sexual harassment. Jamie’s belief that he did nothing wrong is echoed by many adults when confronted about their actions. This isn’t just individual malice, it’s the product of systemic gaps in empathy, education, and accountability, built over years.

The Role of Leadership in Redefining Masculinity at Work

This is where leadership must step in, not just to enforce compliance, but to shape culture. When leaders role-model respect, acknowledge their blind spots, and prioritise ongoing gender sensitisation, they signal to everyone that dignity and justice are non-negotiable.

Addressing toxic masculinity isn’t a soft issue. It is a strategic one. It impacts team cohesion, psychological safety, talent retention, and overall employee well-being. In a diverse, modern workplace, the ability to engage with different perspectives, respectfully isn’t optional - it is a leadership imperative.

While parents and educators must start this conversation early, leaders have the opportunity and responsibility to continue it within their organisations.

When leadership embraces empathy, reflection, and fairness, they create workplaces where dignity isn’t up for debate, and victims are no longer made invisible by the very systems meant to protect them.

We must stop asking, “Did he really mean it?” and start asking, “What was the impact on her?”

Equally, leaders also need to ask: 

• What can we, as leaders, do to ensure this doesn’t happen again?
• When incidents of misconduct or harassment are reported, who are we protecting?
• What steps are we taking, as leaders, to challenge problematic behaviours, norms, and blind spots?